One Month To Go!

February’s almost over! It has been about four weeks since I started working out for the 20km event – advertised as “probably the toughest obstacle course event on the planet”, ack!

Monkey bars. I don’t think I'd succeed. But I’d still go through them and enjoy doing it! Then I’d also find out how many bars I could actually cross. There could also be a very strong possibility that I’d surprise myself or adrenaline rush would enable me to succeed! :-)

I increased my exercise from twice a week to 6 days a week, mainly weights training and swimming. My lunchbreaks were spent in the gym. I carried, pushed and pulled MUCH heavier weights. I pushed harder from the second week, which was when I realised I really needed to get my strength to the point where I could carry my own weight without support for at least 20 dips. I can now do 3 to 5, depending on how low I dip and how tired (or warmed up) my arms were.

I don’t like to run. I struggle to stay motivated past 5 minutes, and hit my “wall” immediately. I don’t like how it makes my knees feel. I went from being a die-hard athlete in primary and high school days to choosing running as a last option. I prefer to row, swim or bicycle instead. This could be an issue during the event as the guideline stated I should be able to run at least 14km. My possible partner had been warned, and he was encouraging (said we have 6 hours to finish and it will give him time to rest, hahahah, sweet!). I know I’d “stop-start-fast-walk” it, with the help of my natural perseverance. I did an 8km marathon (with only two 4km practice runs) in under 60 minutes last year. I figured I know I could endure 2.5 hours of running, plus the time it’d take us to finish 20-30 obstacles. Four hours tops of crazy tough fun! Bring it on! :-)

To improve my cardio, at least twice a week I swam  - 15 metres times 100 laps – more than a mile each session. I’ve never sweated so much while in water before! It was a challenge on the first week. But boring on the second week, so I timed myself to make it interesting - 10 laps in 3 minutes when doing freestyle and 3.5minutes when breast stroke. Now, I just swim for over 35 minutes without counting how many laps I did. I don't finish til after about 40 minutes to compensate for any stops/breaks/breathers during each session. And I just realised while writing this I should have swam for minimum 45 minutes, ack! :-)

I’m a water baby, but mostly self-taught. I’m more comfortable to swim like a mermaid (inspired by Ariel, the Little Mermaid). I’m not at ease with the “formal techniques”. I learned to freestyle etc from watching others and from a tourist who taught me how to dive, kick my feet and take a breath in between strokes like an Olympic swimmer. I was about 9 years old those times he saw me splashing in the pool when not in school or sleeping. The 30 minutes to one hour he spent to teach me became the foundation of my ability to swim now. He was also the motivation behind why I like to teach people of all ages how to swim/float. All I knew of him was that he was either American or European, and that he gave me his swim team jumper which said, “Biarritz” (French?). :-)

Anyway, I can’t (couldn’t) freestyle well without a snorkel (yes, I’ve been doing my laps with a snorkel on, dorky, hahahah ugh). I tried to swim with normal goggles on last week (third week) and I drowned during the first lap. I felt low and sad because swimming which used to be always fun for me became work/exercise/routine. I couldn’t stop between laps to do a somersault or swim around in circles pretending I was a bear or a seal (ehh…heh eheh), or a mermaid. Swimming was no longer “just for fun”.

However, I did love how I am still “soothed” while I exercised, coz water has a calming effect on me. My body/mind naturally feels happy when I’m in water so my mood stayed/became positive. Best of all, I felt myself improving! I felt stronger and this week, in both swim sessions, I could freestyle without using the snorkel’s mouthpiece to breathe!! YAY! I still needed the mask to stop my nose from inhaling water, but I didn’t drown. Woohoo! I might take lessons to fine tune my techniques, in the future. Excited to freestyle properly with proper goggles on. NICE!

…. The biggest change I noticed aside from feeling stronger, and that I always smelt a hint of chlorine on my skin, was that I was always hungry! I already ate like a man. Increased appetite meant nowadays I ate like a horse! I tried to eat healthier, but circumstances this month (and next month) increased my intake of cakes, sweets, pizzas, savouries, ice creams and other junk foods. Aaaaccckk! Eheheheh ugh! Lots of get togethers, meals and picnics also meant I drank several “occasional” wines and beers (1 to 3 maximum per outing, mostly only 1 serve).

I also put on about three to five kilos (66kg approx), but my body felt the same. I look like I weighed less. This is why I tell girls to not gauge their health by the number on the weighing scales. I was under 50kg last year after my trip. I did not feel nor look healthy. I did not feel beautiful. I like my body with meat. I love having a little pot belly to rub. :-)

My pants are not tighter (nor loose). I was told the extra kilos must be the muscles I’ve gained. I admit I thought I’d lose weight, even after all the excess eating and drinking I did. But only because I worked out so much! I see the benefit of being lighter, for this event. The less weight I have, the lighter the load I'd have to carry. So I better work on eating healthier, with less or no more of the indulgences at least until after March. It'd be hard, hahahah ugh!

I'm excited. I didn't do this for charity or any honourable cause. Only for fun with friends and for the personal challenge. We'd definitely finish the course. But I am very curious in what condition at the finish line!!!???! I also wondered why I'd willingly go through this tough event and also paid for the opportunity!!!??? :-)

A Quiet Celebration

Finally! This Saturday, the 18th, marked the day I finally had ALL my personal belongings. If you read my earlier post "Mementos", you’d know it took a lot of effort/years, I lost much and I decided this month will be my cut off date. After yesterday’s haul, I accepted the rest as “gone”. I noticed straight away what was missing…. *Shrugging, hands up in the air*, I figured, "Eeehh??!?! They were just stuff... material things".... I mentioned which items only to bestie whom helped move my things. C’est la vie!

I haven’t seen bestie since last year, though we’ve spoken on the phone. So catching up finally in person was cause for celebration on its own :-). I got two great hugs from him – hello and goodbye. Nothing special about the way they were given - very quick hugs, but with love, and safe. While we/he drove we talked about his European trip and future plans with his beloved (she’s wonderful, I’d love a man version of her for me!), and talked about my trip experiences with more details and my future.

I felt released as I sorted through the boxes, and thought, “these are it, all of it”. A feeling of great relief slowly filled me up while I enjoyed the closure. I never liked prolonged drama, so I started feeling so ecstatic I wanted to celebrate. I felt so liberated I could not concentrate on the task of getting rid of more possessions. I ended up laying on top of the chest box, cradled my head with my arm/s, kicked my feet up in the air (leaned on the wall/boxes), and smiled while I listened to random music from my phone radio :-).... VERY HAPPY. Bestie had to pick up beloved from the airport, and most likely she would be tired/jetlagged. So he went back to the storage company an hour later to drop me home, and I commemorated the day alone.

Our talk about Europe and Italian pastas reminded me how much I loved how simply they made their meals. Inspired by an easy recipe bestie mentioned, I cooked it for lunch. It was delicious! One of my best simple meals in fact! I even enjoyed the whole cooking process ;-). I made it even more special when I opened a small bottle of champagne to drink with it! I felt so good and so happy! A perfect way to celebrate my feeling of freedom! :-)

Later that night, I watched a free orchestral (classical music) concert at the park with a friend. They played music inspired by places – Mexico (playful), Aboriginal Australia (breathtaking) and Finland (dreamy). It was a perfect way to end my quiet celebration.

Top 14 Favourite Love Quotes in the Bible (For the 14th Day of February)

For God so loved the world,that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

John 3:16

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There are three things that amaze me—

no, four things that I don’t understand:

how an eagle glides through the sky,

how a snake slithers on a rock,

how a ship navigates the ocean,

how a man loves a woman.

Proverbs 30:18-19

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A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love.

Proverbs 5:19

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Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my lover among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste. He has taken me to the banquet hall, and his banner over me is love.

Song of Solomon 2:3-4

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My lover is mine, and I am his.

Song of Solomon 2:16

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Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.

Song of Solomon 8:6

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Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

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So Jacob served seven years for Rachel and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.

Genesis 29:20

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Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.

1 John 3:18

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There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

1 John 4:18

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Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.

Ephesians 5:25

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However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Ephesians 5:33

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Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

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And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Colossians 3:14

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Operation Christmas Child Update

* Update for http://herstory-rachellerachelle.blogspot.com.au/2011/08/operation-christmas-child.html - for people who donated gifts to add to those collected at work. *

Hello everyone,

Belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Below is a list of countries where the ninety-two (92) shoeboxes collected during the Operation Christmas Child campaign were sent. The gifts were taken to these ports then transported to various cities as well as remote villages, to reach the children who were aged 2 to 14 years.

Destination Country     Destination Port      
Cambodia                      Sihanoukville  
Cambodia                      Sihanoukville (For Phnom Penh) 
Fiji                                Lautoka
Fiji                                Suva   
Papua New Guinea        Madang 
Papua New Guinea        Port Moresby   
Thailand                        Bangkok
Vietnam                        Haiphong (For Hanoi)   
Vietnam                        Ho Chi Minh    

I am sure the children felt the love you expressed through the gifts you filled the shoeboxes with. Thank you again for your wonderful support and participation in this campaign.

Mementos

For two years (and longer) I struggled to gain back my properties that were held by someone from my past. It should have been a simple process, but I could not access them until ownership was fully transferred to me. It was a frustrating situation that tested my patience and understanding. Then I was informed by the storage company that they were destroyed. I had to deal with the emotions of forever losing my mementos - personal artwork and sculpture, photos, achievements, riches, and several sentimental items. I didn't have much keepsake from my past, especially from school days and younger. So the few I had were all I could identify with.

Thankfully it was a false alarm, the loss averted. My things were moved for destruction, but were found in time by the lady who was aware of the situation (she tried to resolve the issue for years with me). Many aggressive negotiations later, I finally have half of the property. Picture shows the boxes sorted and stacked on top of each other, next to other boxes to be destroyed. I had go through all those boxes to work out which ones were mine. Hard, dirty and heavy work. Hopefully the rest - my most expensive and valued collections - to be returned to me by end of this month. I'm hopeful yet doubtful, as I don't know which of my things were kept??..

Nine boxes of various sizes saved. About seven of them filled with books, clothes and shoes. Favourites, but non-essentials, and will most likely be thrown out. The rest were sentimental items and/or unknown. I took home mainly confidential paperwork, old journals and diaries, and photos. I didn't have enough time to sort through all the boxes this weekend past. But I knew enough that my jewelleries/riches and expensive collections such as designer items and wines (for example, Penfolds Grange Hermitage 1962, 1971, 1974 and 1990) were missing. I didn't even want to sell those wines. I wanted to drink/enjoy them with love ones! :-) In 2007 I had them opened and tested by Penfolds, and they were all still in perfect condition. I had sips of each one and they were very nice indeed.

The end of this month will be my cut-off date. If the rest of my property were not in my possession by then, I will shrug my shoulders and move forward. It suits my goal this year to have lesser material things at home. I salvaged some keepsakes from my photos and notebooks. They will have to be enough. But I will shed some tears of farewell over my lost paintings, sketch books and the beautiful sculpture I created when I was in year nine. Art was not a part of me that was encouraged nor developed, but those times that I immersed myself in its colours and expressions were one of my most memorable.

This experience showed me that I became possessive of the material things that reminded me of my past. They helped to create what I perceived to be my identity, and validated me. I'm sure there was also ego involved - being able to prove how much fun I had, how talented I was, how great my life was, how beautiful I/we were, that I existed, and I wanted to be remembered. These were some examples of why I likely became attached to them. The material possessions served as evidences (to others but mostly) to myself, because I knew, eventually I/we (or a lot of people) forget.

Having lost everything (or many things) made me realise that life continues on. I really didn't need them to settle down and create my home. There'd be less clutter, which I preferred. Plus the pain of losing those "identifiers" (if not your decision to rid of them), like any other suffering, eventually goes away or is exchanged with gladness/better choices. God's always provided for me. This trust and understanding made me appreciate the present, and live it with love and acceptance - with or without material things to identify me.

So onwards of course, as per usual, continuing to live and love life now, focusing on having good relationships and serving others :-).

Monkey Bar Challenge

Several months ago, I registered to participate in a 20kms obstacle course event. I didn't think much of it, as I was busy prepping for travel. I noticed people were more interested in it after I got back. They made me realised I may have been keen, so I would most likely complete the course, but currently in no shape to survive a LOT of the obstacles we would face along the way!!!

The main one for me, which caught my focus, were the "monkey bars". I've never used nor played with these. I only hanged on to them for a few seconds to stretch my back or because I passed by and I could reach the bars. Currently, that is all I could do - hang on to the first bar. No upper body strength to pull/push my own weight through to the next bar. ACK!!

The other obstacles I was sure other participants could help me out. Though heavy, I was also ready to carry a log on my own, if this task was included. But to cross the monkey bars!! I would be on my own!!!! I have less than 60 days to get myself strong and fit enough to "walk" these!! I could see myself falling into the mud pit! Still, I am also challenged to not fall in there, so I am dogged in my determination to cross from above!!! I could almost hear myself growling...! :-)))

I started the strength regime this week. I swam 100 laps last week (again later tonight!), but that was more to improve my cardio. Swimming and carrying weights made my arms and back quite sore. I'm not really happy with the exercises I've been doing though. They don't feel enough - push ups, lats pull downs and eerrr, sitting on the side of a chair then lowering myself down and up while my arms are behind me holding on to the seat. I need to build more strength to use the "weight-thingie" where I stand on my knee and pull myself up, somehow the weights below the seat where my knees rested helping to push me up.... What is that contraption called!!!??! At the moment, I feel stupid on it, it is just pushing me up, no power worthy of mention coming from me to pull my body up.... :-/

I think I need my back to be strong, to pull me up, not just my arms. I have to work on the V (ribs?) on my back more...? I hope I don't end up with big muscles, I don't like them on me. I like my (lean) fats on my body more, having softer arms! I prefer seeing those awesome V muscles on the backs of men, not on me!!??!

What other exercises or weights style/techniques can I do, concentrating on giving me a stronger upper back, to be able to pull myself up????

I will do my best!!!!! :-))))