Some people do not know how to react to my changes. Or they do not understand (agree). People who have been connected to my life. People who knew me for several years. Also people I wished/thought knew me better (after years of interaction).
For about a decade, I had diverse (and repeated) pressures, adventures, lessons, challenges and reshaping - to the person I am now. It did not strike me fully until a year ago and initially in August 2010 (to post in the future, maybe). So I guess, depending on when people met me; and how well they got to know me versus how they perceived me or what they wanted from me; was how they remembered me/us. My priorities changed, but I thought I was still the same person, the same core, the parts I could not fake.
I, did not know how to react to their reactions. I struggled with impressions of me being different. I could not understand why their expectations changed. I was shaken up with my positives and my negatives, as expressed (verbally and non-verbally) to me. I did not pay much heed to those reactions, until this month. I guess because I knew that despite of, my truest and longest-serving friends/families would accept me (and they have, bless their sweet hearts) regardless and they knew the "real me"", aka "my core". Plus, we all went through crossroads and life changes, right? Some transformations more pronounced than others. I thought mine was no more (even much less) than everyone else's. But for the sake of writing rambling thoughts out loud....
I will focus on the issue of my spirituality as it is the one getting the most attention. But let me highlight that the circular endless talk regarding this also includes people who are newly known or/and want to make sure I hear their opinions too. Similar to how I did it when I did not understand, because I wanted to make sure they did... (irony?). Anyway, this could be a continuation of a previous blog. I'll fast forward through events.... I attended a weekly bible study group at work (but only those colleagues knew) pre-2007 in Australia. I wanted to know God more but I went overseas. Regardless of where I was, I looked for and attended church services. Those years gave me interesting insights to forms of worship and praises. In Asia/Africa/Europe - few friends (house mates mostly) knew I went to church almost weekly; or I watched the live webcast from a church in Notting Hill (London) when I had nowhere to go. I was very private about my (shaky) relationship with God. I rarely read the bible on my own. I knew the stories and several verses, but I forgot their contexts and where I read them. I did not understand the difference between church-going with heart and application, and without. I did not want to be labelled with people's understanding of "religious" and having a religion. I was/am not a follower of the (disappointing) systems as I understood. I was not going to pretend I was a Christian when I was not trying to be one, or not being a true Christian (as mentioned in Spiritual). I was not over the fence in the Christian side. I strongly thought fence-sitting (staying lukewarm, using religion only when it suited) was worse and hypocritical. So I chose to stand in the other side.
I do not mind being called a Christian now, though I still cringe internally when I hear the covert and overt attacks and sarcasms to what it signifies. I know the history, the current affairs, the understanding, the misuse, and the stigma, that comes with the label. They did not magically disappear from my consciousness. I still disagree with many applications of the bible teachings by other Christians, as they do me - serving our human purposes and own wills, instead of glorifying God. I am still wrestling with many verses I read in the bible. In selfishness/fear/pride/lack of understanding/weakened faith, I struggle with parts of the lifestyle Jesus fashioned. Patience. It will all take time. With help and guidance from God, understanding the Word, indwelling of the Holy Spirit, life experiences and fellowship. I jumped over the fence, and joined the throngs of people I berated and interrogated in the past. Receiving similar (plus more!) to what I gave, a serve of my own medicine, and some humble pie, ugh. It is a change that is impossible for people to go through alone. The wave against it is too strong, being counter-intuitive and counter-cultural. I at times miss my old private worship, it was quieter, but I would never go back to the same laissez-faire mentality. So I accept the noise/confrontation it brings. Life. All part of breaking the old to create the new - a concept we all understand. Believe me when I say it is breaking me for good (aka growth?). The relationship is also not only about breaking and suffering, or doom and gloom stuff. Not at all, as the blog "Assurance" showed. God is empowering and amazing. Be patient. These will be discussed in future posts, I'm sure.
Because of the (strong) mixed reactions, I wondered how I was in the past...!!!??! Why do/did they see me that way? Was I bad? Why do they think I am (not) that way? Did I still morph into the person I did not want to be? Why was it different to how I thought I was? How different was/am I? What external changes are they talking about??? Why am I bad now? Why are they treating me differently? Why all the questions?? If few people complained or made comments, it could be their personal issues. Some continued on with me as normal, some shook me up, some hurt, some insulted, some uncomfortable around me, and some avoided me. Life. With various levels of interaction and judgment from both side. When valued people in my life reacted, it is out of love and service that I should pay attention and evaluate. Those questions were asked because it was important to be self-aware. But not be self-focused,
I struggle to explain this part, sounding like I don't care for the concerns of my important relationships whom do not agree/understand, because I most heartfully do. I hope you will know that I am still the same me that loves and cares and accept and is equal to you. I am transforming, but I am still the chaotic mess you love (or I hoped you love, ;-)) heheheh). I am on a challenging journey focusing on God. Our (yours and mostly mine) concerns, complaints, fears, limitations, frustrations, desires, lack of understanding, plans, dreams, etc etc etc etchetera... are heard and wrestled with, but pushed aside as less important. God is important, not me. I won't spend time convincing you in this mind shift. Not yet, until I am more experienced to relate it better. It is not about you. It is not even about me, though it is my stories. I will need time and understanding to relate these too.
Still, naturally, I sought counsel from a friend, to ensure I was not losing the plot. Luckily this friend has the most insight as he knew me socially, personally, professionally, and spiritually, for more than a decade. He's seen and heard all the phases I went through. He knew and would tell me the truths. He said I always attracted people (and judgment) because of my nature, personality, looks and lifestyle. He talked of examples when people were intimidated by me and described me to him opposite to what he saw. I did not become bad and I was not bad. I pulled through the storms and matured from life experiences, so my decisions and actions reflect those wisdom/baggages I gained, but I maintained my values and character. I was always very spiritual, but I am more vocal now. In the past I only asked questions (opinionated), but now I am yielding (listening) and applying.
For about a decade, I had diverse (and repeated) pressures, adventures, lessons, challenges and reshaping - to the person I am now. It did not strike me fully until a year ago and initially in August 2010 (to post in the future, maybe). So I guess, depending on when people met me; and how well they got to know me versus how they perceived me or what they wanted from me; was how they remembered me/us. My priorities changed, but I thought I was still the same person, the same core, the parts I could not fake.
I, did not know how to react to their reactions. I struggled with impressions of me being different. I could not understand why their expectations changed. I was shaken up with my positives and my negatives, as expressed (verbally and non-verbally) to me. I did not pay much heed to those reactions, until this month. I guess because I knew that despite of, my truest and longest-serving friends/families would accept me (and they have, bless their sweet hearts) regardless and they knew the "real me"", aka "my core". Plus, we all went through crossroads and life changes, right? Some transformations more pronounced than others. I thought mine was no more (even much less) than everyone else's. But for the sake of writing rambling thoughts out loud....
I will focus on the issue of my spirituality as it is the one getting the most attention. But let me highlight that the circular endless talk regarding this also includes people who are newly known or/and want to make sure I hear their opinions too. Similar to how I did it when I did not understand, because I wanted to make sure they did... (irony?). Anyway, this could be a continuation of a previous blog. I'll fast forward through events.... I attended a weekly bible study group at work (but only those colleagues knew) pre-2007 in Australia. I wanted to know God more but I went overseas. Regardless of where I was, I looked for and attended church services. Those years gave me interesting insights to forms of worship and praises. In Asia/Africa/Europe - few friends (house mates mostly) knew I went to church almost weekly; or I watched the live webcast from a church in Notting Hill (London) when I had nowhere to go. I was very private about my (shaky) relationship with God. I rarely read the bible on my own. I knew the stories and several verses, but I forgot their contexts and where I read them. I did not understand the difference between church-going with heart and application, and without. I did not want to be labelled with people's understanding of "religious" and having a religion. I was/am not a follower of the (disappointing) systems as I understood. I was not going to pretend I was a Christian when I was not trying to be one, or not being a true Christian (as mentioned in Spiritual). I was not over the fence in the Christian side. I strongly thought fence-sitting (staying lukewarm, using religion only when it suited) was worse and hypocritical. So I chose to stand in the other side.
I do not mind being called a Christian now, though I still cringe internally when I hear the covert and overt attacks and sarcasms to what it signifies. I know the history, the current affairs, the understanding, the misuse, and the stigma, that comes with the label. They did not magically disappear from my consciousness. I still disagree with many applications of the bible teachings by other Christians, as they do me - serving our human purposes and own wills, instead of glorifying God. I am still wrestling with many verses I read in the bible. In selfishness/fear/pride/lack of understanding/weakened faith, I struggle with parts of the lifestyle Jesus fashioned. Patience. It will all take time. With help and guidance from God, understanding the Word, indwelling of the Holy Spirit, life experiences and fellowship. I jumped over the fence, and joined the throngs of people I berated and interrogated in the past. Receiving similar (plus more!) to what I gave, a serve of my own medicine, and some humble pie, ugh. It is a change that is impossible for people to go through alone. The wave against it is too strong, being counter-intuitive and counter-cultural. I at times miss my old private worship, it was quieter, but I would never go back to the same laissez-faire mentality. So I accept the noise/confrontation it brings. Life. All part of breaking the old to create the new - a concept we all understand. Believe me when I say it is breaking me for good (aka growth?). The relationship is also not only about breaking and suffering, or doom and gloom stuff. Not at all, as the blog "Assurance" showed. God is empowering and amazing. Be patient. These will be discussed in future posts, I'm sure.
Because of the (strong) mixed reactions, I wondered how I was in the past...!!!??! Why do/did they see me that way? Was I bad? Why do they think I am (not) that way? Did I still morph into the person I did not want to be? Why was it different to how I thought I was? How different was/am I? What external changes are they talking about??? Why am I bad now? Why are they treating me differently? Why all the questions?? If few people complained or made comments, it could be their personal issues. Some continued on with me as normal, some shook me up, some hurt, some insulted, some uncomfortable around me, and some avoided me. Life. With various levels of interaction and judgment from both side. When valued people in my life reacted, it is out of love and service that I should pay attention and evaluate. Those questions were asked because it was important to be self-aware. But not be self-focused,
I struggle to explain this part, sounding like I don't care for the concerns of my important relationships whom do not agree/understand, because I most heartfully do. I hope you will know that I am still the same me that loves and cares and accept and is equal to you. I am transforming, but I am still the chaotic mess you love (or I hoped you love, ;-)) heheheh). I am on a challenging journey focusing on God. Our (yours and mostly mine) concerns, complaints, fears, limitations, frustrations, desires, lack of understanding, plans, dreams, etc etc etc etchetera... are heard and wrestled with, but pushed aside as less important. God is important, not me. I won't spend time convincing you in this mind shift. Not yet, until I am more experienced to relate it better. It is not about you. It is not even about me, though it is my stories. I will need time and understanding to relate these too.
Still, naturally, I sought counsel from a friend, to ensure I was not losing the plot. Luckily this friend has the most insight as he knew me socially, personally, professionally, and spiritually, for more than a decade. He's seen and heard all the phases I went through. He knew and would tell me the truths. He said I always attracted people (and judgment) because of my nature, personality, looks and lifestyle. He talked of examples when people were intimidated by me and described me to him opposite to what he saw. I did not become bad and I was not bad. I pulled through the storms and matured from life experiences, so my decisions and actions reflect those wisdom/baggages I gained, but I maintained my values and character. I was always very spiritual, but I am more vocal now. In the past I only asked questions (opinionated), but now I am yielding (listening) and applying.
I do not get your point this time. Okay, maybe because I am not in any spiritual struggles and therefore may have identification issues regards your journey, maybe because I just started learning about you, but I thought – so far - you are primarily questioning values and yourself in context of those values. Which is far more than just your religion, it’s about your complete setup of life.
ReplyDeleteSecondly – as we discussed already at the first 4 peeps picknick – any spiritual / religions approach is always coming from the heart of the people as such, is therefore VERY personal and therefore of course changes in similar ways as the people are changing themselves. This results always a discrepancy between living a religion (personal = floating) and celebrating a religion (institution = static).
It’s the institution (church) which defines the (mis-)use of religion. Therefore it is at utmost importance to have a church which is open minded, accepts people with different background, different feelings and different thoughts. That’s required to enable personal grows / change of the church’s members. And that is one of the reasons why I very personal have a very positive impression regards your church in Swanston Street – which even tolerates a bloody unbeliever like me ;-)
Maybe it helps, if you admit that your search for good is indeed a bit more a search for yourself. And that’s something we all do somehow more or less – that’s why we all are in a constant change more or less. Therefore your friends should understand your quest as such. And therefore you should accept that your friends and their perspectives are changing, too – which of course results into a new, different way they see you as their point of view is shifting.
But what do I know … no clue … just guessing ;-)
Cheers,
Ulrich
Yup, and as mentioned, you ain't alone. It is self-actualisation as you said , but not focused on self and own gain/benefit. Patience. Just have to wait and see (if you will understand, more or less)....
ReplyDeleteRelationships are not static they evolve and change with time, just as people are not static and evolve and change with time; and just as we once used to hold certain thoughts and beliefs in esteem but grow to learn they were lacking and leave them behind, so can relationships reach a natural end. It's more important to examine why we hold beliefs and relationships in esteem than to hold on to them thoughtlessly, or look for reasons to keep them while ignoring their inconsistencies or harmful effects.
ReplyDeleteI once knew someone who became enamoured with the idea that Bible held a higher truth about spirituality, and god and how we should live. If they could not make sense of parts of the book, or if the book appeared to disagree with the values they thought it taught their first reaction was to think that they had failed to understand it in some way, because they were weak of mind when it came to understanding the divine and if only they were able to understand some underlying context they would be one step closer to god. Oddly, often this context required the book to say things it did not mean, but never once did they question if the book was flawed.
This persons story is not unique, it is so common you would have walked past many of them today. Any teaching that requires a person to make it fit their idea of what it should say is no teaching at all, and any book that requires you to edit it in order to make sense of it, means that it does not make sense on its own without your own input. I wonder, by what authority do these people edit in the context they are hoping to find? And why would someone make excuses for a teaching that doesn't make sense to them, rather than examining to see if the fault lies with what it says?
Even more importantly, any teaching that requires a person to submit to the idea that their own perspective is of so little worth that they should blame their own failings when they read something that doesn't make sense, rather than question the teaching itself, is harmful; and it is heartbreaking to watch someone who is smart and vibrant diminish their own self worth because they have confused this self deprecation for modesty and think that it is a virtue.
Modesty does not come from devaluing your own self worth, or accepting the premise that the reason you can't understand something is because you are too flawed. Modesty is born from an informed perspective, where you understand what your strengths and weaknesses are in the broad spectrum of possibilities, and you use your strengths to better yourself with respect for where you currently stand.
There is a reason you are grappling with the teaching of the Bible, and it is not because you don't understand them. It is because they are inconsistent with themselves, and often at odds with the values you already know better about. It is not divinely inspired.
-Pete
@Pete: Well written - once more good point, but i am not sure if it help our Rachelle because questioning the source may push the seaker to defend that source and therrfote result the exact opposite of what was suggested.
ReplyDeleteReligious books such as Koran and the Bible arr first at all written and read by humans. Therrfore such books MUST include all sites of humanity including misinterpretation and error. Both - Koran and Bible - have many authors. Especially the bible had been looped through many languages. Lines are contradicting each other. Current versions have different meanings by paragraphs (I noticed that at Alpha comparing the text lines of my German Bible with the English quotes in the videos). All that leads to one conclusion: The essential thing about Bible and Koran are not the books themselves; it's what people make out of it!!!
@Rachelle: You are such a wonderful human being, you try to fill this world with love and laughter. That makes you be valuable to all of us. Please use your spirituality to strengthen these good sites of yours. You are more important to us than any adjustment to some human interpretation of human texts. If there is indeed any god, how could a god manifest him/herself in books and not in the hearts of the people? Use the book as source of ideas and inspirations - but listen to your heart.
05:44 AM - have to hurry now, biking with the gang at 07:00 AM :-)
Cheers again,
Ulrich
I hear what you are saying but I reject the underlying implication that questioning the source is out of bounds, or that Rachelles reasoning is so week she needs to be manipulated in special ways in order to be prepared for it. The truth of a claim stands on its own merits and I will pose questions that seek to expose truth regardless of whether she chooses to accept the answers that are uncovered or not. I am not in charge of what Rachelle thinks and I am not interested in manipulating the beliefs she already holds. I'm interested in questioning why they are held, and if they are true because If those outside of her religious/spiritual influences are not questioning the source, then you do you think will?
ReplyDeleteTo Rachelle I would ask, what is point in seeking the truth of something, if one is already unwilling to throw it away if they learn it is a lie? Until you are ready to accept the possibility that the reason parts of scripture do not make sense is not because you don't understand them, but because they do not make sense, then there is really no valuable questioning taking place. I'd love to see you claim ownership of the great traits that make you beautiful to others, and not just the ones that you think are flawed, especially the flaws that have been fabricated by your beliefs.
-Pete
Pete, Pete, Pete. You are so caught up with everything wrongful and negative and deprecating that you found about the religion, you cannot hear the righteous, positive, encouraging, empowering, building, inspiring, and loving reasons why people choose to believe. The more people align their lives in God’s will, the more confidence and peace they feel to have a relationship with him. But to know his ways (like in people we know) we need to spend time with him.
ReplyDeleteYou see the impossible or harsh stories and expectations, but you may not really have tried to understand the reasoning behind it. God will never lead us to violate our conscience. All your questions and rebuttals have been asked and answered decades before. We are not more or less enlightened or blessed or smarter than everyone else. But some people are more willing to soften their hearts and mind to allow God to enter their lives and let God show them who he is. We are asked to change our actions to match the Word (Bible). But we interpret the Word to suit our behaviours, our (un)willingness, our ego/pride and prejudices, and our vested interests. Hence all the issues, misuse and stigma caused by mankind. Some of us also believe we are the all-powerful one, no one else above us, in control of all.
This Christian thing is not an exclusive club, anyone can have a close and intimate relationship with God. But it is a personal journey, and unless you really let go of your defences and allow God to reach out to you, nothing I say will make you understand. We just have to agree to disagree.
Rachelle, Rachelle, Rachelle. You are so caught up with the idea that you understand the will of god through an ancient collection of books with conflicting accounts that you cannot hear the reasonable, sound and valid reasons why people choose not to believe. The more people that align their lives in an honest search for truth, the more confidence and and peace they feel in their real relationships with other human beings.
ReplyDeleteYou see the difficult or harsh criticisms and expectations, but you may not really have tried to understand why they are reasonable. Truth will never lead us to violate logic. All your questions and rebuttals have been asked and answered over and over again, centuries before. We are not more or less enlightened or blessed or smarter than everyone else. But some people are more willing to strengthen their intellectual honesty and minds to allow logically reasoned inquiry to enter their lives and show them how to discern between consistency and fallacy. We are asked to change our reasoning to be consistent with itself. But we interpret our senses though a methodology that aims to omit any bias from our behaviours, our (un)willingness to accept what we find, our ego/pride and prejudices, and our vested interests. Hence all the issues, misuse and stigma caused by poor thinking. None of us believe we are the all-powerful one, no one else above us, in control of all.
This rationalist thing is not an exclusive club, anyone can have a better grasp of rationality. But it requires a personal choice, and unless you really let go of your defences and allow reason to guide your thinking, nothing I say will make you understand. We just have to accept that you are more interested in holding onto your beliefs than you are in questioning the most fundamental aspects of them.
There is no positive benefit that religion offers that cannot be achieve through purely secular means.
-Pete
@Pete: What is the value of wrong & right if not reaching out by heart? And how can anybody claim to have the full understanding of what's real and what's not?
ReplyDeleteThe last to comments of you and Rachelle celebrated the difference and accused the other of blindness. This is not constructive at all - it may even rip apart a good friendship.
By chance it would be helpful to concentrate on Rachelle's original post: She feels enstranged to old friends asking hereself why that's happening.
You can read in other posts that Rachelle did not feel comfortable with the Cathlics in her younger years (let's have in mind that the cathlic church is very formal driven and keen to define religious experience in detail for it's members, similar to many 'churches' of Jews and Moslims). Rachelle explaind that she was more questioning in the past - including herself; that she hesitated to be labeled because she felt her spirituality being something very personal.
But know she changed as explained in the last posts, she does not like argumentations no more, prefers listening instead, looks for close contact to a single church and likes to match the word (Bible).
I read this as a change from an actively exploring person to a person tired of being 'lost' and in urgent need of guidance.
I very personal do not expect Rachelle's need for guidance being just something 'spiritual'. i assume it's an overal mental thing. And it's something we all experience especially in times of psycological crisis.
Therefore reaching out with a loving hand (or having a beer, invite to a party, walk the beach with her as a friend, etc.) is needed know - doing a step towards her. Any wireframe trench position is contraproductive and increases the distance.
You both seem to be smart persons - why ain't you guys start with having lunch together and learn / verify what you have in common? That may make it so much easier to deal with the differences in a respectful and understanding manner.
Pete, Pete, Pete. Where is the "love" button? Out of all the comments you have sent me, I like this the most. Very well written. :-))
ReplyDeleteEverything is personal choice. I chose to go through this path, you chose to go through yours. The beauty of life is changes are inevitable and always possible. Let's live it out, wait, and see. Exchange/Share stories, experiences, thoughts and opinions til our old age.
(By the way, you would have met Ulrich if you came to the Australia Day Barbeque Party last week. Come join the group activities we organise, especially this summer. There's all kinds like eating out, cycling, concerts, movies, picnics, sports, outings, etc. Uli, since you two kind of know each other now, can fill you in with those events I'm not aware of coz my ankle has put me on pause-slow mode.)
Ahhhh.... Uli, Uli, Uli. I will read yours later, I gotta hop! :-)
ReplyDeleteForgot to sign the last post. All blame for typos and bad spelling to
ReplyDeleteUlrich ;-)
I'll gladly spend time with you Rachelle any time we're both free, you know I don't have anything against you personally I'm questioning your beliefs.
ReplyDeleteEither the god you believe in exists, or does not exist. There are literally billions of people who claim to know that their idea of god and what god wants is true, and yet within those billions you will find millions (if not more) of incompatible versions of gods yet AT MOST only one of them can be right, or alternatively all of them could easily be wrong: Even yours. In fact, you are almost as much of a disbeliever as I am, because you don't believe in all of the gods that don't fit your idea of god is, whereas I don't believe in one more than you.
Out of these billions of believers, millions of them could easily write a blog with just as much conviction as you using the bible and their spiritual circle of friends as a guide, but disagree completely as to what is true about god and what god wants from them. By what authority do you claim to be able discern between what ideas about god are true, and which are false?
This idea is too important to blindly "live it out, wait, and see." We already have the tools to discern between consistent ideas which may be true, and inconsistent ideas which cannot be true, and we know a consistent idea of what god is can only be taken seriously if there is evidence that such a god actually exists. If you have an idea of god that makes sense and the evidence to show that such a god exists than show it to me, and I will willingly believe, but as long as the only thing you have to offer is faith, then you can keep it, along with the billions of other faithful who disagree with you but cannot substantiate their claims any more than you can.
If you were to give me evidence that god exists I would willingly change my position to one of belief, because I am interested in what is true and what is not. I suspect you claim to be interested in truth, but are unwilling to even accept the possibility that the truth may be that your god doesn't exist. How intellectually honest can that position be said to be? If you think you have an answer then tell me this: I told you what it would take for me to abandon my atheism, now tell me what would it take for you to abandon your faith? If your answer is 'nothing' then you are not taking your spiritual quest seriously. If your having trouble answering that question, then maybe you could first ask yourself why you don't believe in any other gods.
-Pete
Ulrich, good points too. You made me stop to think about whether I was "lost"... coz I thought I was "found"... while seeking guidance. Thank you for the kindness and understanding.
ReplyDeletePete, I never tried to convince you of my beliefs. You questioned me. I answered you. You didn't like my answers. Now we are still having these discussions.
Wow,
ReplyDeletejust made this blog as my homepage because this blog has more activities than my Facebook page ;-)
Thank you for your comments/arguments/questions. All of them reasonable and valid. But at the end it's everyone's own choice.
Believe or not believing?
Struggling or not struggling?
Following your mind or your heart?
I will try to keep a healthy balance between them now. (still seeking for some form of almighty/wisdom/God you name it...)
Important is that you feel good about it.
Let's enjoy the time we have on this planet and try to have a meaningful life.
Thank you Rachelle for this post and thank you guys for your replies. Really like reading it.
Best wishes
Kham
"Pete, I never tried to convince you of my beliefs. You questioned me. I answered you. You didn't like my answers. Now we are still having these discussions."
ReplyDeleteTo be fair, you have invited me to share your journey and give you feedback, and that is the genesis for this dialogue. Through subsequent discussions you have tried to make just as much of a case for your own beliefs, but you didn't like my answers to your questions either :-)
Discussions require an exchange of ideas, and people who are willing to share them. If you're interested, you still have a number of important questions outstanding, but you've no obligation to answer them. I'm not going to force a dialogue if it is unwelcome.
-Pete
Quote "Uli, since you two kind of know each other now, can fill you in with those events"
ReplyDeleteHey, I may be a stupid, German shitface with a sledgehammer sensibility and a massive leak of brain cells an, but I am NOT gay.
:-P
~Ulrich
Pete, I believe I answered enough, as per above. Though I blog, writing does not flow easily for me. It may take me 1 hour to write about a topic we can chat about in 10 minutes. I would rather write about other things, and talk about yours. If you want deeper discussions, let's discuss them in person. Plus, this method is so impersonal when it is obvious that you feel strongly about it. See you soon. :-)
ReplyDelete(Everyone is always welcome to comment of course, and for everyone to join in the discussions. Most people though seem to be quite private (but understandable) as I am getting emails, chats/calls and text messages instead of here. I do not reply to all, but I do read them, grateful and considering all the stories and comments shared. Some inspiring other posts, as you've seen. Thank you.)